Reprisal
by kygirl101
Summary: Kuze Takeshi pulls a prank in bad taste. Tamaki takes revenge. One of my favorite stories I've ever written Rated for lanuage and sexuality.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ouran, neither the anime nor the manga, and although I would like to, I am perfectly content to write fanfiction for now.

**A/N:** This just hit me last night. And I am very proud of it. However, Kuze Takeshi does not appear in the anime, so this is in the manga-verseTherefore, here is a little something for all you manga-buffs! Also, 'Reprisal' means vengence/revenge.

* * *

**REPRISAL**

The second that Suoh Tamaki and Ootori Kyouya set foot in the large cafeteria at Ouran High School, they knew something was off. Whispers, giggles, glares and scathing comments made their way after the pair, and every eye followed them as they sat at a table with their other Host Club members, another rare happening. Haruhi would usually eat in her classroom, accompanied by the Hitachiin twins unless they had mischievous plans involving the lunch room, and the seniors would usually skip the sixty-minute eating period in favor of some martial arts.

The commoner turned large, sympathetic eyes on her upperclassmen, clutching an issue of Ouran's monthly in-school newspaper in her hands. She looked torn between shoving it at them and tearing it up, and compensated by twisting the rag within her fingers. The twins also had a copy, and Hunny and Mori had their own issues, looking appalled. This was rather off, and interesting enough for Kyouya's hand to extend and pull the copy closest to him (consequently, Mori's) into his grip and opened it, Tamaki reading eagerly over his shoulder.

"Turn to page five," murmured one of the twins, moodily picking at his lunch set C. The other snarled at the table, growling lowly, "I'll kill him. I swear to god..."

This made no sense, but the Ootori turned dutifully to page five and began reading, his eyes flicking from word to word as his expression progressively soured.

Ouran High School Host Club

-A fun after school group, or more?-

The Ouran High School Host Club prides themselves on the catering abilities they offer to the girls here at school, showering them with flowery, recycled words of love and adoration, but the question currently posed is how these seven boys, who are known as our classmates and entertainers, can so willingly and easily lie. Yes, that's right, lie! Lie to respectable girls and women alike!

It has been brought to our attention by a reliable and anonymous tip, that the boys of the Ouran Host Club may actually bat for their own team, and play this ruse for females to simply inflate their already overlarge egos. Many clientele of the club, after being confronted by this suspicion, divulged information that only added fuel to the fire. "I always see Fujioka-kun being fawned over by Kaoru-kun...Or Hikaru-kun. I can't tell which, but they seem to really, really like him," says another source.

"Tamaki-kun is really romantic and all, but sometime's he's more sensitive and emotional than me, a trait I associate easily with gays...He'd make a pretty homo, though," giggled another.

"Kyouya-san is always so withdrawn...Sometimes I feel like he's really just uninterested in me." This young woman was partially hysterical by this disgraceful innovation, and ran away sobbing.

"Mori-senpai is really dedicated to Hunny-senpai...but sometimes it is almost _too_ close."

This leads to another query! Are the Host Club boys sexually experimenting with each other, or other boys within the school We have it on good authority that at least one of them is in a committed relationship, and we are offering a cash reward for any information about this surprising sex scandal. Who is the mystery boy and who is his even more mysterious lover?

To view the fan girl votes and statistics put together by Hoshakuji Renge, turn to page 9

Tamaki made a whining sound in the back of his throat as Kyouya lowered the newspaper calmly, adjusting his glasses. Hunny's seldom seen second personality was coming out, and he had taken to glowering at anyone who dared look at them, and Mori made no move to stop him. By now, one of the twins (Hikaru?) had begun violently stabbing his steak while the other one was trying to pull the metal screws from the table legs. Haruhi still watched them, cautiously reaching out to brush Kyouya's shoulder.

"Senpai..." she bit her lower lip tentatively.

"What is it, Haruhi?" the Ootori demanded, looking and sounding tired and fatigued where anger and annoyance may have been better suited.

She faltered, any vocalization dying in her throat. Wild hand gestures were waved in front of her face as the brunette attempted to think of the best way to explain it. Luckily enough, these motions invited the other members to join in.

"It was Kuze-senpai," one twin says, picking up his fork in the hand not holding a steak knife and adding it to the brutal assault of the meat.

The other Hitachiin flinched, seeming to have cut himself on the underside of the table, and drew his finger to his mouth to suck on. "Ouch!! Eh, he's the one who gave the Newspaper Club the idea, and provided those '_anonymous_' quotes."

Kyouya raised an eyebrow at their bold accusations. "And just how do you intend to prove that?"

There was, again, silence, a moment in which Tamaki plucked the paper from his best friend's slackened grip and disappeared behind it. Then the other all tried to answer at once.

"Kyouya-senpai, he's just _mean_!"

"He always thought we were fucking faggots." _Stabstab._

"He was telling the whole American Football team how he _'knew'_ it was you and Tono, and he kept on talking in detail about how you two screw."

"Kuze-kun was imitating you, and it was really, _really_ rude!" Hunny sounded close to tears.

"Look." Mori pointed.

They, all seven of them, swiveled in their seats to stare at the table where, sure enough, Kuze Takeshi was mining a prissy little princess move with knocked knees, a flowy movement of his hips, limp wrists and the most ridiculous expression on his face while all the other boys (and even some girls) laughed wildly.

Kyouya swallowed, recognizing a goad when he saw one, and feeling anger and the desire to do something welling up inside him. He adjusted perfectly situated glasses on his nose again, and made to push his chair back from the table and stand, giving a quite. "Well, then—"

Tamaki was faster.

His chair legs scrapped the linoleum loudly, and his seat clattered to the floor when he stood. The blond didn't even stop to pick up the furniture, nor answer the questions posed by his other shocked and incredulous club members. In a few short and sharp strides, his interventional direction was clearly intended, but no one else really seemed to notice him walking succinctly toward the turned back of Kuze Takeshi (doing another malicious imitation of an unspecified member of the club), rolling the newspaper into a funnel as he went and looking at the back of the other boy's head with furious and purposeful intent.

_Whapwhapwhap._

Three times in quick succession, the blond smacked the head of the Football team over the back of the head, succeeding in attracting Kuze's attention. The boy turned around, holding the spot he had been his, only to face a hysterical and scandalized looking halfer wielding a newspaper.

"You bitch!!" Tamaki accused in a very high-pitched and squeaky voice, commanding everyone of the room's occupant's attention, and placing both hands on his hips in an akimbo pose. "You promised you wouldn't tell! After all I do for you, you just turn around and throw it in my face! You—you, _**man,**_ you!!"

He descended with the newspaper on Kuze's defensively upturned arms as the football player protested, "What—Suoh-senpai!! Stop it!"

"Oh, we are soooo over! Don't call me, and never expect me to do that again!!" And with one more resounding hit to the head, the chairman's son spun around and strutted from the cafeteria, a distinctively feminine swing in his hips and a suppressed smile playing around his mouth. That smile surfaced in all its blinding glory as soon as the door to the lunch room swung closed and explosive laughter sounded. He could distinctively hear the Hitachiin twin's cackles, Hunny-senpai's high pitched little giggle and the booming exclamation that could have only come from Mori-senpai's throat and only resounded once. He could imagine Haruhi and Kyouya's expressions, and that made it all the more fruitful to hear Kuze's outraged, "I have no idea what he's talking about!! Shut up!! Oh, stop laughing, Kanan!"

Revenge was sweet.


End file.
